Divorce is tough, but it's even tougher on kids, who quite often get caught in the middle. Many children of divorced parents end up with psychological issues because of how poorly parents handle divorce and life after divorce. If you and your spouse are getting divorced, there are certain things you can do to make it less painful for your kids.
Keep the Conflict to a Minimum
Open conflicts and even passive-aggressive behavior should be avoided, especially when the children are around. Many children will attribute the conflict between their parents to something that they did. Parents should also avoid criticizing each other. Don't assume that children are too young to perceive passive aggressiveness or understand sarcasm.
Enter a New Relationship Cautiously
Starting a new relationship is usually a sign that someone is moving on. However, some kids may take this as a sign that the parent is moving on from them. When starting a new relationship, ensure the person is accepting of your kids, your former spouse, and even their extended family if they play an important role in the lives of your kids.
Divorces that end up in court are rarely handled in a calm and measured manner. A court case could shine a light on certain aspects of both parents and could also put the family's secrets out in public. This can make it harder for your children to interact with their friends at school. Talk to a divorce attorney at a law firm like the Hugh O. Allen Law Offices and see if mediation is an option so you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse can reach an amicable agreement on wealth division and custody of the children.
Both parents should try as much as possible to be present in their children's lives when the opportunity presents itself. This means attending sports activities, PTA meetings, plays, and any other activity that has an impact on the life of your child. It's important for your kids to know that you're invested in their lives and are doing your best to support their success.
Don't Get Your Kids Involved
Don't use your kids in any way, especially as spies to get information about the other parent. Doing this essentially makes your child choose sides, and this can have a negative impact on how they relate to you and the other parent in the future. Try to communicate with your former spouse directly or through their attorney.